My Big Fat Jamaican Wedding

Counting down to the big day

Wedding Survival Tip #5: Get Help

on July 27, 2012

Adam’s sister Carlton has stepped up in a big way. She has not only offered to design the decor and details for the reception but she’s also going to be our wedding day coordinator. Here she is thousands of miles away in Victoria, BC armed with “glue guns, reggae and mimosas,” according to Katy, Adam’s stepmom. “A day of crafting with Carlie as we countdown to the Big Fat Jamaican Wedding!” Exciting!!!

I did not realize how difficult this Wedding Survival Tip would be to accomplish and how much I like to have control.  I had a very clear vision of what I wished for my wedding– lots of DIY (do-it-yourself) features, a rootsy island feel, very creative, and very “us”.  We made our own invitations down from scratch down to printing them on my home printer.  I wished to make my own veil again from scratch but decided to just buy one.  (Read my post, Wedding Survival Tip #3 Pay For It!)  But lately, it’s occurred to me that there was yet another lesson I so desparately needed to learn.  Get help!

The nice thing is that so many people are willing to help.  When I told my friend Denise, I wished to make my own cake toppers.  She said, “Great!  I want to help!  I’ll make her dress.” Do I know the first thing about designing, making a pattern, and sewing a dress with a machine?  No!  So that one was easy.  Denise, take ‘er away!

Then there were other things that I knew that I could not obviously do myself like plan my showers.

Lastly, I recruited many family members and friends, guests for our wedding in Jamaica, to pitch in and take on a number of positions to make our week irie.  A few declined for personal reasons, but for the most part, everyone jumped in.  This wedding is really going to be a team effort.

On that note, what I realized last night, the “last pillar” of control was my wedding day.  The actual day!  As many a bride has told me, there comes a point when you have to say to yourself, “Let go.”  So when Carlie (what she is commonly called) reassured me again that she was more than capable and had a lot of experience with weddings at a professional level.  I realized that this was not about qualifications and credentials any more, this was about me being scared to let go.  What I realized is that everyone who is attending this wedding (and helping out) wants very much for it to turn out spectacularly.  Plus, I also realized that it isn’t humanly possible for me to do everything myself (especially with a week to go).  This photograph is proof that it can and will get done with love, care, helping hands, and reggae music.


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